Being “Right” in Sobriety

being-right-in-sobrietyIn sobriety, is it important to find the “right” recovery program or “correct” addiction treatment? Isn’t it essential to find the “right” way of thinking and feeling?

There exist many paths to recovery from addiction. What is most important is that a recovery program is immediately accessible, that it is constantly available and requires daily practice, and that it replaces behaviors which lead to or result from addiction.

Find a program which is free or affordable and which takes recovery into your daily life.

Practice the program everywhere you go. Addiction and its triggers will continue to follow you and you need to build new defenses and solutions.

Replace the words “right” and “correct” with “useful” and “productive”. Striving to be “correct” or “right” will take you back to your addiction. We form mental “committees” to debate and prove our righteousness. Obsessions start to cloud our consciousness and “being right” becomes self-destructive.

After so many years of research, why are there so many different treatment programs and approaches to recovery for addiction?

Many motives, both benevolent and self-serving drive research and the design of treatment programs for recovery.

The higher the cost or the greater the financial investment over time, the more important it is to research its mission and intension of the addiction treatment program.

Addiction is perhaps the most multifaceted disease which requires scientific research from medicine, sociology and psychology, also needing insights and guidance from spiritual, philosophical and humanistic schools. The result is a diverse set of approaches and programs for addiction recovery.

From large bodies of research, the most effective addiction treatment is provided by a trusted and respectful person who provides structure and direction over an extended period. The methodology of treatment is less important than type of relationships developed in a program of recovery.

Why do so many sober people insist that it is so important to give up self-reliance and personal initiative to find a recovery program from addiction?

Through our process of addiction, secrecy and dishonesty have become necessary defenses which have destroyed our ability to trust others. It is this trust that researchers have found as the essential ingredient for treating alcoholism and addiction.

Significant neurological and cognitive impairments result from alcoholism and addiction. Using this broken machinery to solve an all-encompassing problem is impossible. People engaging in a recovery program must accept different direction, take in new information and stop being “right”.

“Being right” implies that new directions or information are not needed. The alcoholic and addict present a desperate need for different solutions.

The belief that we cannot recover from addiction through our own knowledge and direction seems self-defeating and weak.

We become self-defeating and weak when we repeatedly try failing solutions and behavior, expecting different results. Using alcohol and drugs to relieve discomfort or to gain pleasure become futile exercises toward the later stages of alcoholism and addiction.

Attempting to practice new behavior without the assistance of others and the support of a sober support network is also often futile. In recovery, people learn from each other and replace the relief and pleasure of the chemical with that of being a friend.

How could someone else know what I need to get sober anyway? Why should I listen to what others say? I’m unique!

Terminal uniqueness is a great defense against change. People who have limited their solutions and resources to drugs and alcohol desperately need outside information, advise, direction and support.

People gaining sobriety are unique as are people who have successfully engaged in recovery. That difference can be shared along with the commonality with our struggles with drugs and alcohol. Our feelings are often common.

The story may sound different but the loneliness, fear, hopelessness and desperation are shared.

 Why is “being correct” dangerous to a personal recovery program?

To maintain sobriety and engage in long-term recovery, we must remain “teachable”. Being right or correct often closes us off from very helpful teachers and new ways of understanding and solving our problems.

Our old behaviors and solutions no longer work in recovery.

What is humility and why do people think that it’s so important for recovering from an addiction?

 “Humility” allows sober people to remain “teachable”. Consider “humility” as finding where we fit in a sober support network and how we accept help and new solutions.

What does “self-righteous indignation” mean anyway?

“Self-righteous indignation” is that annoying characteristic that some people practice helping them feel better about themselves or convince themselves that their work is over… they have achieved righteousness.

“Self-righteous indignation” isolates people and creates resentment and loneliness. In sobriety we find that being open to new information and solutions, and reducing the friction we create between ourselves and others is essential.

Twin Town Treatment Centers is immediately accessible to all Los Angeles and Orange County residents, is accredited by The Joint Commission, and is certified by the California DHCS. All network HMO/PPO/EPO insurance plans and Medi-Cal contract with Twin Town Treatment Centers to provide drug and alcohol rehabilitation. Our phone is answered by real people. We can see people on the same day you call. (866) 594-8844